How Your Life Can Change…

How Your Life Can Change…

The way I have seen things before, my friend Piero (not his real name) had it all. He married since 2005, they had two healthy and happy boys aged 6 and 3, and he had a good paying job. Hard worker, loved his family and his new home. Perhaps64874_498421486862166_861397987_n all that “new” kind of lifestyle was too much, I wish my friend Dr. Erica would be close by to support Piero.

Because there was a dark side, too, as we all know, there is always one.

He struggled with a nagging, hidden insecurity complex in his mind every day. Was he really good enough for his family? Did he really have what it took to be the best father, husband and be his best at his job?

To fight these negative thoughts, Piero often turned to inner thoughts that somehow turned to anger. And then it happen. Out of the blue the police showed up at his home, charged him with assault causing badly harm and life took a totally different turn.

Before that devastating day last December, Over time, his behavior had began to take a devastating toll on his life, his family, and his job.

His marriage and family life was cut off immediately and both sides were being torn apart. Piero only solution and decision has been t take control of his life as soon as soon to keep what he have and improve from there on.

As today, from the look at the situation, Piero have two choices. One, he could continue to follow the path he has walked so far, knowing that it would destroy his life, marriage and his relationship with his boys. Or Two, recognize the wrong doing and behavior so far and make certain all in the family seek professional counselling for the sake of keeping the young loving family together in the future.

~ Let Go and Let God. ~ May God Allow Piero to Do His Best and for certain God Will Do the Rest

What I will write from here on will take great strength on each one involved. We are praying Piero and other people in the same situation, will work things out together with his family, wife/husband or whoever it is involved and make life better, before it escalate for teh law enforcement to get involved. Using Piero “story” (I call it his sacrifice) my hope is that people who read (myself included) and who is aware of this article to use it as strong motivation to help make big changes for the better in our life as a whole.

Imagine this…as my friend Donna Merrill would say, it was two days after Christmas. For most of us, that was time for the usual fanfare after the season and somehow adjusting and prepare for next wonderful New Year celebrations.

Piero was not that lucky. He was taken to a holding cell before he was released with conditions to stay away from his wife and kids, and spending New Year, and the days that followed, between his mother home and a friend apartment.

196859_468657999838515_375056358_nLooking ahead in time… I wish all the best God can allow for Piero and his lovely young family.

Just now finished reading positive messages from my friends Rachel Lavern and Chery Schmidt, their messages of positiveness got me inspire to have MORE Faith and Hope in God and I love to believe that “Today”, “Piero is happy as ever and in control of his life. His marriage is strong, and his sons are the centre of his life, and he now has the time, energy and finances to keep up with the little guys that keep him busy every day. The outgoing, energetic, enthusiastic, loveable Piero that I knew back in the days, has returned”.

We have a inner sensor that never fail…

Fortunately, when faced with tough fight for our lives, we come to our senses and chose to take the right direction. And even though it may be the hardest decision we may ever have to made, it is always the best. Piero, myself and others with noble intentions know very well that we need to change for the sake of making life better for the sake of our family, our kids, our friends and the decision may not be easy but doable.

Side personal note here, as Kim Brink – Castleberry some times say: Because we put aside our embarrassment and take courage to reach OUT for help and for positive support. We are able to admit there was a problem and then we take personal responsibility. Piero done it and countless others made the same decision to change, and I believe implementing some proven pillars of transformation any one life will change for the better

What transformation changes are suggested (as best as I can share here?)

1… Social Support from loving family members
2… First, have some accountability partners, he got support from his wife and immediate family, second, he had accountability to health professionals, third, he planned and prepared his future life to live better and avoid temptations, fourth, he found an incentive (the relationships with his son and wife, and his job), and fifth, he set The Deadline for changing.

All of this took great strength but it was supported by those 5 essential elements. These are the 5 Pillars that are very well promoted to achieve success in similar situations.
Changing is not easy. True and lasting transformation never is. But it is possible and proven by many. So no matter where you are in your life struggles, use Piero as inspiration not to give up on what is important to you 1461240_10201095508209728_902542594_nand your life.

There are two things that you can take action right now.

1 – If the above story hit a sensitive cord and resonated with you in any way, please leave a comment. 2 – Share with others and make the day for someone who need it.

No matter what you do, thank you in advance for that you do.

Thanks for reading the story and I hope this helps and inspires you.

_I am nickc

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About nick catricala

Passionate to help, support, add value and wings to our unique and exciting life journey! _nickc is author of "The Commitment of a Lifetime" as well as an avid self improvement practitioner, spiritual truth seeker and entrepreneur. _nickc lives in Ontario, Canada, and love to publish positive, uplifting content at his InnerVeritas sites and can be contacted 24/7 at: (206) 203-2170 (Tel./Fax) or by eMail: nicavita@gmail.com
This entry was posted in Attitude, Faith, Goals, Growing, Health, Love, Success. Bookmark the permalink.

36 Responses to How Your Life Can Change…

  1. Kumar Gauraw says:

    Hi Nick,

    You’ve shared a very inspiring story and great tips along the way with us today. I think this is a great reminder for us that we all have that dark side of ours and we need to be aware of that.

    This problem only gets resolved when we are aware of our self and when we make a decision and practice discipline on a daily basis to keep the good in us overpower our dark side today and everyday.

    Thank you for sharing and inspiring us today.

    Regards,
    Kumar
    Kumar Gauraw recently posted..9 Characteristics Of Highly Successful EntrepreneursMy Profile

    • Kumar,
      thanks for your positive and encouraging comment.

      You are correct when you said that it is all up to us to correct what ever areas we need to correct.

      Being disciplined will help immensely and any one who discover that virtue.. will succeed in everything that they put their mind to it.

      Thanks again.
      _nickc

  2. Hi Nick,

    I am so happy to read in the end that your friend got the help he needed and that it did not end in a tragedy.

    I’ve been through a lot in my life but I have only thought once about suicide and I got help immediately. I know it is rough for some people to admit they need help.

    I will share your post all over in hopes it will help someone in need.

    Have a great day. Monna
    Monna Ellithorpe recently posted..8 Easy Steps To Improve Your Profile PhotoMy Profile

    • Hey Monna,
      glad that you were as happy as me to know my friend was fine at the end.

      As you, many people have been in many non great situations and went through many challenges in life… but as soon as it is known help is needed, it is imperative to seek help right away.

      Very happy that you found the post as interesting so you can share with others.. hope it will be beneficial to all.

      Thanks again.
      _nickc

  3. Alan Jenkin says:

    I’m wishing all the best for your friend “Piero”. His story, unfortunately, is all too common. The lessons you draw from it, though, are universal.

    Thanks for sharing, Nick.

    Alan
    Alan Jenkin recently posted..Success – A Reality CheckMy Profile

    • Alan.

      thanks for the best wishes. I know he will benefit enormously.

      So many lessons in life are very common.. and it is great when we get to use the experience gained and used to do better in life.

      You are very welcome and thanks again for your interest.

      _nickc

  4. Hi Nick, it’s such a shame how feelings of unworthiness and lack of self confidence can take over all your thoughts, and then you do things you really don’t want to do! The best thing we can do for ourselves is to have good feeling thoughts, and to do stuff that’s fun! But for some people, that is really really hard, unless they have the support like you talk about! I hope your friend continues on his “worthy, self-confident” path Nick!
    Julieanne van Zyl recently posted..How to Create a Static Homepage with Free WordPress ThemeMy Profile

    • Julieanne,
      You said the right things here.. it is shame for all of us who cannot come to our selves and know we are worth so much more that others may say to us we are and much, much more than we think when in certain events in life we feel we are not worth..

      As in a normal situation… we tend to believe everything in the world is rosy.. but I tell you. from what I noticed personally and from others, when life is not as we know it to be “normal” things can change drastically and most times in a flash.

      My wish and how is always that everyone will always know their worth because God give equally.

      Thanks so much for your comment.
      _nickc

  5. Wow Nick what a story this does make us realize the importance of Not taking what we have for granted huh?

    It was nice of you to mention me here my friend, staying positive is high on my list of priorities for 2014!!

    Wooo Hooo Keep up the Great work and thanks for sharing.. Chery :) )
    Chery Schmidt recently posted..Are You Kidding Me! A Secret To Success!My Profile

    • Hey Chery,
      my pleasure to mention you as a positive storage, because you are hahah :-)

      Yes, taking all what we have and be grateful as they are.. is the best we can do and if for some reason we find our selves deviating from it.. we just need to get back on and enjoy …

      Thanks for your comment.
      _nickc

  6. I think a lot of us don’t realize we are at a fork in the road, and our future depends on the decisions we make today. Not every day is like that, of course, but there are many many forks in the road of each of our lives.

    I remember saying to my husband one time early in our marriage, “What will you be kicking yourself for 5 years from now, if you continue on the same path you are on today?” It’s a great question to ask any time we need clarity in our life today.

    I know I am at a fork in the road right now, and it’s so important that I make the decision that is right for ME, rather than bowing to the opinions of others.

    Willena
    Willena Flewelling recently posted..Groundhog DayMy Profile

    • Willena,
      you said correctly,
      not every one realize we are always on a fork in the road at every day at every decision we make each and every moment in life.. glad some of us do at times.

      Understanding as you did that we are always at a fork of the road every day.. will help for certain of our outcome in the future…
      Thanks so much for your comment and for sharing your thoughts always welcome.
      _nickc

  7. Sarah Arrow says:

    A thought provoking post Nick, I can see how Dr Erica would help Piero. I too would like to think he’s in a place filled with the happiness that he sought. The 5 pillars will help anyone if they know what they are and where to find them, and sometimes all you need is a friend to guide the way.
    Sarah Arrow recently posted..10 Writing Mistakes [Infographic] – Which ones are you making?My Profile

    • Sarah,
      tahnks for your lovely comment.

      You said right, yes, Dr. Erica could support him for sure, but I also know that with sincere prayers as yours “I too would like to think he’s in a place filled with the happiness that he sought.” it will help and he will benefit enormously.

      A friend or anyone who care to support anyone just for the sake of helping a human being in need.. is ALWAYS accepted and I know God will compensate teh donor and the receiver.. so life can be better for all.

      Thank you very much again for your support Sarah.
      _nickc

  8. Nick,

    I started reading this story and was surprised to see my name. Thank you for referring to me. I do wish I could have talked with Piero before the incident escalated. But sometimes that’s exactly what it takes, getting to our lowest point from which we are finally ready to rise up to our higher being.

    When Donna Merrill was surprised that this incident happened 2 days after Christmas, I had a different reaction. Christmas and the holiday season bring up a lot of emotions, feelings of inadequacy, comparing our life to what we believe others’ lives are like.

    Piero is actually very fortunate. He may have gotten out of control and is now having to face the aftermath, but he had support. He had a home to go to (his mother’s and his friend’s; he had the support of his wife; law enforcement took charge so that his anger did not escalate to the point of accidental or even intentional murder (which I recently wrote a few articles about).

    Any one of us can be driven to rage when we feel as if life has been unfair or our partner is doing something to us that we don’t like or deserve. Forgiveness and love and finding a way to be grateful for what we do have, not resentful for what we think we don’t have.

    Thank you for sharing this sad but real story, a scenario that is all too familiar in our current society.

    Warmly,

    Dr. Erica
    Dr. Erica Goodstone recently posted..The 10 Relationship Powers You NeedMy Profile

    • Dr. Erica,
      Yes, I understand… it would have been amazingly helpful if he could have a session with you, but you know what? it may become a reality if I find a way to steer him your way and you can support them via Skype or Google Hangout.

      You were surprised to see your name… well, I have known you for a while now, I know what you do (some of it any way) so I could not think of any one else more qualified for these sensitive issues.

      In regard to when it happened.. just after Christmas and what high emotions are in that period of time is 100% correct… I am aware and for that reason I do my darn best to keep cool, knowing is a passing thing because once the pressure of the holidays is over, life will get back to normal, what ever normal that is.

      It does not tale long to be driven to a rage especially when someone we love is concerned and we believe things should be different.. and believe or not, for as much as I know, that was the MAIN case why all this escalated at that point.

      I hope there is no need for them to get back to normal.. and as soon that happen perhaps will share your contact info and you can take over from there to support them start living a more fulfilled and happy life.

      THANKs for being who you are and for doing what you do to support so many.
      _nickc

  9. Sarupa Shah says:

    What a lovely share Nick…I would like to add too that what happened happened and the past is the past and having no attachment to it helps people move on too…that is not to say action to be who you truly want to be isn’t necessary but sometimes the past has too much of a strong hold….
    Sarupa Shah recently posted..Why ‘I can’t’ is limiting your money flow…My Profile

    • Sarupa,
      your attitude is perfect.. what happened happened and leave all behind.. but I must say from experience that may not be as easy to do for some of us or sometimes hahah :-)

      You may know different and I wish you will continue doing it because that is for sure a better way to deal with life… learn from the past and move forward to do better.
      Holding to the past can be destructive..

      Thanks so much for reading the article and for your great comment.
      _nickc

  10. Nick, It’s a terrible shame to hear how your friends life took a downward spiral. This is a reminder of how fragile we can all be when our circumstances seem to keep stacking against us. The problem is when people experience these emotions they hide them and don;t seek help until it’s too late. I hope things work our for your friend and that his life gets back on track.
    The Food Curator recently posted..My weekend food workout – Homemade PaneerMy Profile

    • Michael,
      yes, is very terrible when those things happen, and I wish that they will be restored as perfect as possible soon…

      It is not easy to know what we do, when in those situations.. unless someone who we trust and love can share with us some light.. somehow we get tangled up in that state of mind and alone is almost impossible to get out but as it happened in thi instance.. I am certain all this will brake that chain of events and soon they will see the light and move forward in life as best as God allow them because every one suffered already more than they needed to.

      Thanks so much for your great comment.
      _nickc

  11. Hello Nick….Thanks for this inspiring post….I think the key to change is having the support from our loved ones…and from the ones that already have a positive outlook and already stable….life experience sure helps….but a person has to have the willingness to change and work at it…you have some very good tips and a good plan that can help anybody change for the better….as long as a person accepts the need to change and willing to work hard at it…..we can’t help someone if they don’t want to help themselves….sometimes its heart breaking to wait for them to get around to open their eyes….so we pray for them and be available when the time comes….Thanks my friend…a very good post….talk soon ….Smokey
    Gregory Bowen recently posted..I’m Back….And Even Stronger!My Profile

    • Hey Smokey,

      nice to see you back in action.. love to read more of your stories :-)

      Wonderful that you found this article inspiring.. I know you have helped many people already with your wisdom and experience.. and I trust you will continue doing so.

      You are correct and wise to write “as long as a person accepts the need to change and willing to work hard at it” it al start there.. KNOWING that we need support and soon after the rest will be easier and better.

      Thanks so much again and wish you all the best in all you do.
      _nickc

  12. As what I’ve learned from coaching school, negative thoughts are there to prevent you from making changes. Acknowledge it and assure yourself that it’s okay to move on and take that step to move forward. In some instances I had to challenge that inner voice that’s persistent about an old belief. Once I have proven that the old belief is not working, the inner voice goes away along with the old belief. You are right Nick, support of family and friends is really important and must be seeked, not shunned away. I hope your friend Piero makes the right choices for himself and his love ones.
    Cherrie Bautista recently posted..Eight Common Habits of Happy PeopleMy Profile

    • Cherrie,
      you are so wise and good hearted.. thanks for your great comment and for the best wishes for Piero.. just as a side note, things have already got better and I am encouraging to focus on what is good as you suggested here, “negative thoughts are there to prevent you from making changes”

      This topic is not easy to tackle at all times, but what I experienced so far is that when you focus on doing as best as you possibly car with sincere intention to benefit the whole… situations always end up better.

      Our family, friends or anyone who may offer support is always great to accept and use as best as it is possible.. and everyone wins.

      Thanks so much for sharing your experience at the coaching school.. very interesting how we use the input of information we receive from so many sources.
      _nickc

  13. Lots of times we get into a situation that is over our heads and we don’t know how to get out. Then somehow a solutions appears. it might not be one we would have chosen in the first place, but somehow winds up being the best one for us.

    Thank you for sharing your friend’s story, Nick, I hope he is continuing his path of healing.

    • Stephen,
      so true what you wrote, I can tell it comes from lots experience and wisdom that you acquired from life in general…it is very refreshing to read these words.. THANKS so much.

      And by the way, yes, I am happy to report that him and the whole family is taking the healing pathway together and I trust it will be beneficial for every one involved..

      Your observations are correct 100%.. we never know what will come out of anything but most times, whatever will come out of it is always useful in one way or another and with sincere intentions and heart.. all will be well at the end.

      THANKS so much.
      _nickc

  14. I’m sure that most of us have said or done things we wish we hadn’t. When we do, we are most grateful for people’s forgiveness and understanding.

    I think all people deserve that, even if they must pay for their mistakes with loss of trust, or even criminal retribution.

    There are laws and courts that must determine just punishments. My prayers are with them to do the right thing to protect society, yet offer the most leniency that is feasible.

    As for the rest of us, we are not in a position to judge… either legally or morally. We have the gift of being able to offer mercy and understanding rather than judgment and punishment.
    David Merrill 101 recently posted..What Traffic and Conversion Strategies Do You Use?My Profile

    • David,
      WOW, I can feel that your wise words come from your heart and life experience…

      Yes, forgiving and understanding is a great medicine and solution.. I have been guilty of not able to do that for many, many years.. and now sometime I can (not as much as I want to, but I am happy I can do it most times more than before.)

      The law is great to be there.. but the law of GOD is much better and is much more easy to reach, but most of us take a long time to accept and use it so some how we tend to take the wrong direction and so we may end up in front of people who represent the law.

      Thanks for sharing your wisdom on this topic.. and thanks for writing it down as you did.. it is great “As for the rest of us, we are not in a position to judge… either legally or morally. We have the gift of being able to offer mercy and understanding rather than judgment and punishment.”

      Thanks once again.
      _nickc

  15. Heather says:

    I absolutely loved your post. My life hit a major stumbling block a couple years ago. It took everything in me not to give up. I didn’t have the support I expected to have. In the end, I learned where to cut ties and where to reform strong bonds. I am still working on the forgiving others for the damage they caused me, but I want peace so it is a goal.
    Heather recently posted..Homeschool conference coming upMy Profile

    • Heather,
      thanks for the compliment about the article.

      Sorry that you had to go through what you had to go through in life and learn what is best to do for you…

      Life takes certain turns that we may not accept or not believe is best for us, but most times we will find out it was the best thing to happen for us…

      Hope you will benefit from all what come in your life.

      _nickc

  16. Hi Nick. What an inspiring story. I’m glad to hear that your friend was able to start working through his difficulties and found forgiveness from his family.

    I had a very hard situation in my family a number of years ago that has had lasting consequences and probably always will. Forgiveness of the perpetrator was hard, and sometimes the anger sneaks up on me. But I know that if I hadn’t forgiven and continue to forgive, it would have eaten me from the inside out. Forgiveness is for the person wronged more than than the one who caused the offense.

    Thanks for this story.

    All the best,
    Leslie
    Leslie Denning recently posted..How’s the Economy Working Out for You?My Profile

    • Leslie,
      thanks for reading the article and for your comment.

      Yes, I am happy as well that my friend was able to start working his difficulties and just for the record, he is still doing and the whole family is much happier.. not just because he start to work on it but because the whole family done their share…

      Sorry to read that you had a similar situation in your family.. in a way I am happy you kind of forgot about or forgive.. but I like to share with you something that was shared with me before…

      When we find hard to forgive.. we actually destroy ourselves over it.. and once we understand that, we better forgive the other person, not only for their sake but mostly for our sake…
      Hope t helps in some ways to alleviate the pain you still have at times…

      Thanks again.
      _nickc

  17. I know too well how situation like the gentlemen you were referring to in you post can manifest. I’ve had personal experiences with that very thing. Being the one with the mental turmoil as well as the recipient of the out bursts from one that suffers from it as well.

    It takes time and a lot of dedication to make the necessary changes. Some people never figure this out or just don’t want to do the work and they wind up going no where.
    Melanie Young recently posted..Technical Difficulties..My Profile

    • Melanie,
      thanks for your comment and thanks so much for sharing some of your personal life… I hope all is well with you now and you could put behind what was not pleasant.

      Yes, I am certain it takes time, but as with much of our successes… by working on it diligently.. healing come much sooner and so we can star enjoying life more again.

      Thanks so much again and I look forward to read happy and constructive lifestyle articles from you soon.
      _nickc

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